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  Iona started jumping again. “Nope. I sure don’t.” She licked her tongue at Donavan.

  Cynda cautiously asked her daughter, “Do you think you’re old enough to give yourself to God – baptism is a serious thing.”

  Iona waved off her mother’s concern. “I’m not getting saved tomorrow, Mom.”

  “You’re not? So you changed your mind about getting baptized?”

  “No. I am getting baptized tomorrow, but I got saved last month.”

  Eyebrow arched in confusion, Cynda asked, “Well, do you think you’re too young to be getting saved?” She looked to Nina and Isaac. “Now, I understand that you will try to influence her in that direction. I just think she should be able to make up her own mind on this subject.”

  Iona held up her tiny hands. “Oh, no Mama, they didn’t influence me on this. I just figured that since God has been loving me for almost eleven years, it was high time I started loving Him back.”

  Nina smiled but said nothing until she and Cynda were clearing the dishes and the rest of the family had moved into another room. “Did you understand what Iona was trying to tell you about the difference between baptism and salvation?” Nina said to Cynda.

  Sighing with relief Cynda told her, “I had no idea, but I was too embarrassed to ask my own child to explain something like that to me.”

  “Well, what Iona was trying to tell you was, baptism is just an outward showing of a heart change that has already taken place on the inside of us. Does that make sense now?”

  Putting the dishes on the counter, Cynda replied, “Yeah, I think I get it. It’s kind of like how I decided not to wear certain clothes anymore. Because to me those clothes represented who I was before I married Keith. So I tried to show him outwardly that I was different.”

  Close enough. Nina wasn’t going to split hairs on an issue that Cynda would have to come to understand through a true heart change, which only God could give her. “So, are you okay with going to church tomorrow? I know what happened the last time kind of made you back off of going to church.”

  “I had a talk with your husband about that. He knows better than to call me out in front of his congregation again.”

  “Good.”

  “Anyway,” Cynda continued. “This is important to Iona. So I have to be there. I’m tired of missing out on special moments in my child’s life.”

  ***

  Later that night, Cynda and Keith took the kids out for a movie while Nina and Isaac stayed home.

  “You hear that?” Isaac asked.

  Brows furrowed, Nina asked, “Hear what? I don’t hear anything.”

  Isaac stretched out on the couch and pulled Nina down with him. “That’s what I’m talking about. Peace and quiet. It’s been a long time since we had any of that.”

  “Amen, Pastor Walker. Peace and quite is a good thing.” She adjusted herself on the couch next to him, then turned on the TV with the remote. “What do you want to watch on this Saturday evening?”

  “I don’t think there are any games on that I want to see, so you choose.”

  “Oh, no. The last time I picked what we were going to watch you talked about me for a week.”

  Tickling her, he said, “That’s because you picked a chick flick. Pick anything but a mushy love story.”

  “I like love stories.” Isaac frowned. Nina turned off the TV. “Okay then, let’s just talk.”

  “I like that Idea, Mrs. Walker. Can you tell me something?”

  Nina snuggled up closer to her man. “What?”

  Isaac put his arms her. “Everybody seems to be doing better – I’m getting along with Cynda, you’re getting along with Iona.” Nina arched her eyebrow and Isaac amended, “Most of the time.” Nina agreed, and he continued. “I know that you haven’t conceived yet, so I was just wondering how you’re doing – are you okay with how things are?”

  Nina smiled as she planted a kiss on her husband’s forehead. “I’m okay. In fact, Mr. Walker, I figured something out.”

  “Well don’t keep me in suspense, woman. Enlighten your man.”

  “You remember that my doctor told me he thought I was going into menopause the same day you brought Iona home?”

  “Yeah, I remember.”

  “Well, I believe she was a gift to me. Iona coming to our house was God’s way of telling me that He hasn’t forgotten me – that I will have more children.”

  Isaac kissed her. “God can do it, baby. We’ve just got to trust Him.”

  “I know,” Nina agreed, then said, “Now I have a question for you.”

  “Shoot.”

  “Do you have your sermon ready for tomorrow?”

  “Sure do, I finished it the other night.”

  Pointing her finger at him she asked, “Nothing is in that sermon that will upset Cynda, right?”

  Holding up his hands, Isaac said, “Stop worrying. I’m done with all that.”

  She leaned back against him. “Good. Did you call your father?” Isaac and his dad had been having weekly talks since he arrived home from Chicago a couple months back. Nina didn’t know what brought about this change in her husband, but she was appreciative of the fact that Isaac was changing; growing more in tune with God.

  “Yeah, he’s not going to be able to come for the baptism though. He hasn’t been feeling well lately. He’s got a doctor’s appointment on Monday morning, so we’ll know more then.”

  “No sense waiting on the doctor’s report when we can pray right now.”

  Isaac stood up, pulling Nina with him. “Let’s do it. But since were praying, we might as well pray for Cynda too. That woman is still confused about God.”

  “Yeah, she is. But she’s coming around.”

  37

  The next day the Walker family got up early so they could have their last Sunday breakfast together before Iona left for the summer. They then dressed and went to church. And as Isaac baptized his only daughter, he felt a love for this child that was just as great as the love he felt for Donavan. This is my child, Lord. I hope You are pleased with her. Take her and make her into what You desire her to be.

  He looked out into the midst of the congregation. Nina was smiling and crying at the same time. He had married a truly special woman. Iona may have given her heart to the Lord, but she was still giving Nina the blues. That his wife could be happy for Iona was a true testament to her walk with God. Lord, do something miraculous for Nina – give her the desires of her heart.

  When he stood behind the pulpit and preached, he felt compelled not to use the message he’d worked on all week, but the Holy Spirit had redirected him to preach the word God had given him during the revival; the word Isaac had ignored in favor of his own agenda. He wasn’t ignoring God today. So he opened his Bible and preached a message of love.

  ***

  Cynda sat next to Keith and Iona. Her daughter was glowing with the love of Christ and so too was her husband. As Isaac preached and Cynda looked around at the congregation, she noticed how willingly they accepted the knowledge that God could love them so much that he was willing to give up His only begotten son. She also began to understand Keith better when Isaac said that it was God’s loving kindness that drew people to Him.

  Keith had loved her with kindness. The more patient and loving he had been toward her, the more he kept drawing her back into his arms. Keith loved her like God loves his people. Right then and there Cynda stopped worrying about her past issues with God and closed her eyes, willing herself to feel His presence. She told herself, if I can feel His presence then I’ll give Him my heart.

  Keith leaned over and put his arms around her. The hug he gave her caused her insides to flutter.

  “What was that for?” she asked.

  “I just could tell that you needed to feel something. So I hugged you,” Keith replied.

  And there it was. Keith had once read her a passage out of the Bible where Jesus told a group of people who asked to see God, “When you see me, you’ve seen the Fathe
r.” So maybe when she felt Keith’s love, that was God’s way of showing His love for her also.

  “Dear Lord, You have been here for me, haven’t You?” Cynda asked.

  “What?” Keith asked.

  Cynda shushed him and continued to listen to the message. When Isaac finished and gave an altar call for those who wanted a personal relationship with Jesus, Cynda squeezed Keith’s and Iona’s hand, then stood in the middle of the isle. She saw tears cascade down Keith’s boyish face, but she couldn’t move. Her feet felt as if they were stuck to the blue carpeted floor. But then her eyes were drawn to the altar. A man with outstretched hands beckoned her. He was clothed in a brilliant white robe. A rainbow was upon his head and his face shone like the sun. His feet were like pillars of fire. It was the same man who helped her when she was nine years old and had gotten lost; the same man who blew the breath of life into her and wiped away her sweat and tears while she lay disoriented and confused at that rehab. He was waiting for her. She couldn’t wait to get to him. She had to tell him he had been right. The Good Shepherd had followed her all the days of her life until she finally relented and allowed His love to guide her home.

  As Cynda bowed before the altar, the sweet love that God had long desired to bestow on her now flowed into her heart. And all worries of going back to prostitution and not being good enough for her husband dissolved. She would be all right now – for God loved her, and she loved Him right back.

  A woman dressed in a white button down shirt and black skirt touched her shoulders. “Would you like me to pray with you?” she asked Cynda.

  Head still bowed, Cynda pointed to her friend. “I want to pray with him.”

  The lady whispered in her ear. “No one is over there.”

  Cynda smiled as she allowed the woman to help her up. “Yes, I’d like prayer very much.”

  ***

  When they were in the car getting ready to head back to Chicago, Cynda asked Keith if he could stop at West Memory Garden cemetery. On their way, Keith saw a man standing on the side of the road selling flowers. He pulled over and bought a dozen carnations and handed them to Cynda. “I figured you might want these for your visit.”

  Cynda leaned over and kissed him. “You think of everything. Thank you.”

  “Do you want me and Iona to walk through the cemetery with you?” Keith asked as they pulled up to the grounds.

  “No, baby. I need to do this on my own.”

  “Are you sure, Mama?” Iona asked, leaning up from the back seat. “You don’t walk so good on your own.”

  “I’ll make it, honey. Don’t worry about me.”

  Keith helped Cynda out of the car. “Do you have your cell phone in your purse?” he asked.

  “Yeah,” she replied.

  “Call me if you need help getting back.”

  She assured them that she was no fool and headed up the road toward her family’s plot. She hadn’t been to this place since she’d buried her grandmother over a decade ago. But not much had changed. The caretakers had done regular maintenance. The grass was mowed and the weeds cut down. There were mammoth size head stones and smaller marble head stones that jutted up from the ground, out shinning her family’s brass plates that were level to the ground. Her family probably hadn’t received any special care since their bodies had been laid in this plot. Glad she had the flowers, she put six of the carnations on her grandmother’s side.

  Smiling, Cynda stepped back and told her grandmother, “I know you spent a lot of nights praying for me, Grammy. So I came here today to let you know that I’m okay. I did get lost again,” she turned toward the parking area and saw Keith leaning against their car, then turned back to her Grammy, “but this nice man helped me find my way back.” A tear trickled down her lovely face as she declared, “I accepted Christ into my life, Grammy. Isn’t that wonderful?”

  She then turned toward her mother’s grave and paused for a moment. She’d carried a lot of hatred for this woman. She’d felt justified in blaming her for everything that went wrong in her life. Cynda had always justified her man-hopping ways by saying, “What do you expect? My mother was a whore.” She justified taking drugs because she needed to forget the stuff her mother allowed her pimp to do to her. But the truth of the whole matter was that she had stood by and numbly participated in everything that happened to her in her adult life.

  “I hated you for so long, Mama, blamed you for everything,” Her eyes misted over with tears that cascaded down her face. Wiping the tears away, she said, “It’s time I take some blame on my own shoulders. Time for me to let you rest in peace.”

  Cynda took the remaining six carnations and placed them one by one on her mother’s grave until they formed a perfect heart. “I have a husband now and a daughter.” She patted her stomach. “Oh, yeah, we have a child on the way also. I’m going to tell my children about the good things you and I did together. Like the many presents you used to give me on my birthday and Christmas. Good memories, that’s what I’m going to give them.” And as she thought on those things it didn’t hurt so much to think of her mother.

  A couple of fat rain drops plopped on her forehead; the beginning of the forecasted rain storm.

  “Cynda,” she heard someone call. She turned to see Keith waving her toward him.

  “I’ve got to go.” Cynda said as she turned back to her grandmother’s grave. “In case I never told you when I was little, I love you, Grammy.” She looked at her mother’s grave, hesitated a moment, then with one longsuffering sigh and another plop of rain on her head, she gave her gripes with her mother over to God and said, “I love you, Mama. Wish I could have spent more time with you.”

  Keith kept glancing at the sky as she walked toward him. She saw the worry lines etched on his face. She wasn’t worried though. No harm could come to her underneath God’s sprinkler system, only cleansing.

  Epilogue

  Keith Hosea Williams, Jr. was born on a Sunday afternoon in mid-September, four hours after service ended and three weeks after Cynda and Keith had taken Iona back home. Cynda felt the pains all during service, but she was having such a good time in praise and worship, and then the pastor preached such a mighty word, that she couldn’t bring herself to tell Keith she was in pain. When her water broke, she tapped him on the shoulder and said, “I think you’d better take me to the hospital.”

  “What… is it the baby?” Keith said as he stood up just as pastor Norton was making his altar call. “Let me help you up.”

  Taking hold of her arm, Keith pulled her out of her seat as men and women were walking down to the altar. “Did you pee on yourself?” he asked as he viewed the puddle in the seat Cynda had just vacated.

  “No, baby,” she whispered. “My water broke.”

  “Your water broke!” he yelled loud enough for the entire congregation to hear.

  Janet was seated three pews in front of them. Harold Dobbs was seated next to her. She had a 3-carrot diamond ring on her engagement finger and an endearing smile on her face as she turned in Cynda’s direction and said, “Congratulations.”

  Pastor Norton said, “Congratulations and a safe arrive to the little one.” He waved them off and continued to minister to his congregation.

  The baby was now in Keith’s arm. Cynda saw the tears at the corner of his eyes as he cooed and made faces over the baby. When he looked at her, the tears cascaded down his face. “Thank you for my son.”

  A twinge of guilt kicked at her heart and she almost opened her mouth to remind him that the child wasn’t his. But then she thought of how his love had opened up a whole new world for her – caused her to see and feel things in a manner that she would never have thought possible before he came along. And she realized that Keith would love their son so unconditionally that one day even she would forget that he came from the seed of another man.

  Tears of joy filled her eyes as she bent over and kissed her son and his father. She looked to heaven and silently said, Thank you, Lord, for loving me, even w
hen I was unloveable.

  ***

  Two angels stood outside the most magnificent pearl laden gates shouting, “Behold the Glory of God!”

  Directly behind the pearly gates was a massive space where a cushion of snowy white clouds caressed the feet of its occupants. The tree of life stood bold and beautiful in the middle of the outer court. Its leaves were a heavenly green, and its fruit was succulent and enjoyed by all. Sweet blissful music could be heard throughout the great expanse of heaven. It was the harp, but it was better than any harp on earth; it was the guitar, but it was better than any guitar on earth.

  There were thousands upon thousands of saints moving through the joys of heaven, clothed in glistening white robes, and bare feet. Many had crowns on their heads with various types of jewels embedded in them. Several occupants stood, surrounded by the most beautiful array of flowers, colors without names. Heaven was the great garden of love, so these flowerbeds could be found all over this glorious place.

  On the opposite side of the outer court stood a great multitude of warrior angels. Their appearance was that of beauty and majesty. They wore white radiant garments with gold edged trim that embellished the front of the garment. At their waist hung a huge golden sword, and large white wings flapped from behind. These were the multitude that protected the saints of God.

  The outer court was like a waiting room. The saints were waiting to be admitted into the inner court and some, the Holy of Holies. The warrior angels waited for their next assignments. Right now, a great commotion was going on amongst the angels. They were anxious to know their next assignment. Some had been waiting hundreds of years to do what they were designed to do.

  The captain of these angels lifted his hands to silence them. “Brothers, I will have news for you momentarily, I am on my way to meet with the General now.”